Slack Chat: Mayo Clinicians

August 29, 2016

T:  Sometimes you’re the lightning, sometimes you just hope you ain’t the fish.

And sometimes you just douse the flames and move on.

J:  God’s smoking some salmon tonight.

T:  If Drew Carey is right, it’s tuna that is getting smoked. You ever hear that routine, John?

J:  No, never heard that one.

T:  Back when there were all those protests against Dolphins getting caught in tuna nets. Dolphin safe tuna. Drew Carey said, “Well, that’s great if you’re a dolphin, but what if you are a *&$#ing tuna? A tuna is flopping around in the boat; it says what, I’m not cute enough for ya?'”

J:  Getting caught must be like going to heaven for a fish. You go up into the light and see your dead relatives lying around.

T:  Is heaven just a tuna boat? John, you have offered the “heaven as tuna boat” theory.

J:  I think I’ll start a religion: Tunafarianism. Our god will be Ras Tunari.

T:  I dunno, John, sooner or later someone’s gonna want to know how you reconcile reincarnation with the fact that your followers all taste good with mayo and pickle relish.

J:  Splitter!

T:  The mayo schism!

J:  Always look on the white (bread) side of life.